When I was a kid in school, and Valentine's Day came around, the teacher would have us decorate brown lunch bags with hearts and kisses and tape them to the sides of our desks.  At the appointed time, we would run around the room and drop our little cards in the bags of those we wanted to be our valentines and the teacher would give us all candy and a special card for each of us.  We'd run home with our bounty and read each little card to see who loved us enough to scribble their name on the card.  It was heaven.

Whatever happened to that?

When I was dating in college, depending on the guy I was hanging out with, Valentine's Day could be anything from a romantic dinner at some overpriced restaurant he couldnt' afford, in his attempt to both impressed and seduce me... or simply laughing and watching a "chick flick" in the dorm.  It wasn't as simple as when I was a kid, but it was nice. 

Whatever happened to that?

While in the throes of courtship with the man I eventually married, a silly little ritual begain.  I mentioned, the year we met (we met about a month before Valentine's Day, actually), that I loved Pez... and Jelly Bellies. On Valentine's Day, I got both and the most beautiful hand made, hand drawn card.  I still have the card, I have no idea what happened to that first Pez dispenser.  The Jelly Bellies were heaven.

Over the years, the general gifts have remained the same (I really do love Pez and Jelly Bellies) and the hand made cards are tied up neatly and in a box in the back of my closet.  I get dinner some years, jewelry others, all sorts of surprises too.  Its been... loving.

Yet, somehow, I want the dumb little card with his name scribbled on it.... and the candy hearts and the teddy bear and all the other stuff I got when I was younger.  I just what I really want is... younger.  Its gone tho... I know.

Valentine's Day has become this day of remembrance... joy on a quite level, happiness contained.  Its good, very good.  Even without the scribbled name on the card.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone...