I have three acquaintances, intelligent, educated women. We all met as teachers several years ago. We are all ambitious women, with plans for ourselves and goals that are attainable.I'm the only one that's married. With that said, its generally known and understood that I made choices early in my marriage that kept me from working on secondary and terminal degrees until recently. My acquaintances made choices that have included working on degrees... and not being married.Two of them are currently working on their PhDs in education... the third on finished her PhD in education a couple of years ago... and is now working on a SECOND PhD... why? "I love learning"...yeah, right.
I love mah girls... really, I do. I think it fabulous that they've done these amazing things. I ask them, so, Doctor... what you gonna do now?"get back to my classroom, of course."What???I wish I would go back to my middle school classroom with a PhD in my pocket.
Why did they REALLY get the terminal degree? Again, I love them, but I think it was because they have nothing else to occupy their time. Lots of wome with multiple degrees work hard at the career and the education in an attempt to fill their lives... No man, no children... no problem.. back to school I go.
I have a male friend with a PhD who attempted to explain it to me. He is a college professor and works with several women with terminal degrees and no personal obligations. He asked a few of them how they ended up where they are in their personal lives...
"They started out with the idea of establishing their careers and getting a bachelors and masters degree and then, they'd marry and start families. But, the men weren't there when they finished the masters so they went on back to school and got the PhD. Still no man, and no other goal other than "getting a man"... so off they go to college professorships and/or jobs they're overqualified for."No other goal than to get a man. Scary. Was there a point in there where some of them decided... education was a bigger orgasmic experience than a man? Seriously, was there?
A couple of years ago, I sat 4 nights a week for 3 weeks in a class lead by a 30 something woman with a PhD in Psychology. She sat in front of us (never had a prof do that before EVER) and nibbled on candy nightly. She told us a bit about herself... second of 4 sisters, no brothers. Engaged once years ago...but that "didn't work out"... had her PhD for less than a year. When she wasn't acting as an adjunct professor in small Catholic colleges... she worked at the local mental health clinic.
I asked one evening, because it was bothering me... did she plan on getting on the tenure track there or elsewhere, or set up her own practice, or what?"I hadn't thought about it. I don't know. I'm cool the way things are now."
I ran into her the other day, as she visited in my school building. She is still at the mental health clinic... and teaching parttime. She had a piece of candy in her mouth, just bought a new house, spent a few weeks in Africa last summer... and still has no man in her life.Oh, she's thinking about going back to school. I just smiled and wished her luck. She walked away and I wondered... will she enjoy the orgasm she'll have with this degree as much as the last one?
Labels: mah peoples...